new old profile cast rings reviews linkers random notes email layout host

� In this diary, I record my life as a transvestite. Perhaps it will help somebody else, who finds their lifestyle doesn't quite match that endorsed by the 'tranny mafia'. Well, I've been there... and survived. The debriefing starts here.

�loves: All kinds of stuff that society thinks I shouldn't.

�hates: Microsoft. Obviously.

�reads:
secret-motel
artgnome
enfinblue
stepfordtart
ten-oclock
boombasticat
lawliiet
annanotbob
fifidellabon
my-serenade

Lynn Jones
Becky
Samantha

A blast from our past
7:58 a.m. -- 2008-07-21

I was pleasantly surprised to see that Stepfordtart and Anna (if not Bob) have enjoyed a bit of Hawkwind, back in their disreputable pasts. There were mentions of Silver Machine, and of seeing Hawkwind perform in Crawley on a Tuesday night. Back in those halcyon days, Hawkwind was fronted by bipolar poet/musician Robert Calvert, a genius who I never got to see, sadly.

I'd like to draw your attention to a spoken piece that can be found on his concept album, 'Captain Lockheed and the Starfighters'. We join the dialogue part-way through, as a Luftwaffe officer is interviewing a replacement for one of the many West German aviators who have been killed by the 'Jinx Jet'.

...
Recruit: It would be an honour to crash in such a 'plane.

Officer: To be mangled and scorched?

Recruit: To be hideously mutilated beyond the recognition of one's own mother.

(pause)

Officer: Is that makeup you're wearing?

Recruit: Makeup, Sir?

Officer: Yes, makeup. You know... makeup. What ladies wear.

Recruit: Not... only... ladies... wear.... makeup, Sir!

Officer: Well what's that black stuff around your eyes? Is that mascara?

Recruit: It's no good lying to you, sir. I confess it. It is makeup; it's mascara. But... only a little bit, Sir!

Officer: What on Earth for?

Recruit: My mother, Sir!

Officer: Your mother?

Recruit: You see (sobs) my mother was the first woman to fly the Atlantic in a Gaseo glider.

Officer: Gaseo glider?

Recruit: A machine of my father's invention. You see he, too, was too much of a professional aeronautical inventor to actually fly it himself, so mama took it, and tried to fly it single-handed across the Atlantic.

Officer: And what happened?

Recruit: She crashed. Spun down into the sea and was never seen again. They found only her false eyelashes, floating.

(pause)

Recruit: So, you see, ever since I've worn mascara in her sacred memory.

Officer: I see.

Recruit: Well Sir, do I get a plane?

Officer: In view of the confession you've just made, which must have taken a great deal of courage, I consider you an ideal type for the job. There's a plane for you waiting on the runway. The sergeant will give you an instruction manual on the way out... Oh, and by the way, er, Von Trippenhoff...

Recruit: Sir?

Officer: Don`t let the C.O. catch you wearing makeup on duty.

Recruit: Never... never in uniform, Sir.

Officer: Well, all right then. But very subtly applied, is that clear?

...

So you see, tranny culture is all around, if you know where to look! Although of course that's more of interest to me than it is to most folks. And it reminds me; I've never worn false eyelashes. Hmm...

previous - next

|