Confessions of a part-time girl

Underdressing
10:50 a.m. -- 2008-08-14

A small misunderstanding has developed, perhaps?

In response to the confession I posted yesterday, about decorating while wearing knickers, Stephanie commented "I do many things around the house in undies."

What a lovely idea. Victoria does the same, and I like that a lot. In fact, I'm prepared to endure the additional cost of turning up the heating system, to keep her padding around the place in a bra and pants. Yummy.

I should clarify, perhaps, that when I was decorating, I was also wearing some old boy-clothes. Although since I also mentioned superheroes yesterday, you might end up thinking that I was wearing the borrowed underwear on the outside of my clothes.

No.

Let's talk about underdressing.

It doesn't mean turning up at work or a posh restaurant in clothes that are far too casual. Instead, in the transvestite community it means secretly wearing feminine scanties beneath male attire. Not all transvestites are 'out', and even among those who are, few actively seek confrontations in their day-to-day life. Wearing something girlie allows them to recognise their feminine influences, while outwardly conforming to society's requirements. Describing it as 'exciting' would be a little too strong; it offers a relatively small dose of tranny heroin... but the feeling of getting away with something is amusing.

I wasn't trying to get away with anything, although I did undertake one short trip out to the car to fetch some tins of paint. My motivation was to avoid the inconvenience of getting changed, rather than because going into the front garden with knickers (and boy clothes) on was in any way titillating.

Still, why wear knickers under paint-spattered boy-jeans? It can't be in order to create an illusion of femininity, since the feminine attire is covered up. (Remember the "erotic urge to disguise"? Disguise, it seems, cuts both ways.) So in my case, cross-dressing is clearly about the way things feel, rather than how they look.

As part of my background reading (these articles are very thoroughly researched, honest!) I did a Google search for "underdressing". The top hit provided an interesting insight into the broad spectrum of tranny-ness that exists out there. A forum thread from 2004, it invited readers to identify their point on a scale, where 1 was 'only enjoy underdressing' and 5 was 'only enjoy being a woman to the fullest possible extent'.

One common theme among those who contributed to the discussion appears to have been a feeling that progression towards the higher numbers was desirable or inevitable. The other thing that quickly becomes apparent is that many of the people who posted are boasting. It is a curious characteristic of trannies that some always feel the need to 'push the envelope'. Several of those who responded suggest going beyond the 5 that was supposed to indicate the upper limit of the scale.

'Lynn' - a wise tranny whom I have got to know since I started this blog - describes such posts as "tedious p*ssing contests", which I think is as accurate a summary as we need for today. It's funny to think that the macho urge to compete finds such an unconventional outlet as boasting about how girlie one can be.

There are others who respond that they can't really be summarised by a scale such as this, and I think I'd have to be one of those. Failing that, put me down for a 1... unless some lower fraction is permitted. I don't wear makeup any more, and I don't think I own any feminine outer clothes. I suppose I cross-dress a couple of times a month. (Although there were times, years ago, when the whole thing felt like the defining issue of my life.)

The idea of a 'spectrum of tranny-ness' is a common theme. No doubt it will keep on cropping up. Fortunately, it's met with an increasing amount of amusement - even derision - each time. (Those readers who know something of the UK trannyverse might find this post by 'Becky' amusing.)

Gosh, I've included a lot of links in this post. Serve me right if you follow them, and find something far more interesting to read than this humble diary!

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